Do we really need... Instagram?

For the past couple of months (maybe years) I've been seeing more and more pictures on Facebook that appeared to have some Photoshop filters applied to them.  This whole time I've been thinking: People are starting to take their Facebook photos way too friggin serious.  Then my wife's photos started following the same trend, which finally prompted me to ask "When did you learn how to use Photoshop?"  This is when I learned about Instagram, and the whole zombie-fan-boy following it has created.

Why Instagram?

Isn't the name more appropriate for an instant-messaging service than a take-a-picture-and-apply-one-of-five-filters service (poetic license)?  And what the hell?  What used to take talent and know-how now just requires a smart-phone and certain levels of douche-baggery (poetic license)!  The levels of douche-baggery is determined by how many photos you feel the need to run through unnecessary filters.

OK, but WHY INSTAGRAM?

Do we really need Instagram to appreciate this sausage-packaging gone wrong incident?  Did we really need to blur out the background in order to get the full effect of what we are seeing here?  Quick answer, NO!  And what's worse is now I officially hate this guy, even though he would've been AOK in my book for digitally documenting this hilarious sausage blunder!  Side note:  Am I the only one surprised that it's a white guy handling a sausage that size?

Here is my problem.  Picture-capturing technology has made 1,000's of advancements since the Polaroid.  Yet now, in 2012, we take a picture with - literally - millions of pixels per inch, and then filter it to look like it was taken on a Polaroid 40 f*cking years ago! What the hell are we doing people?  Hey, I have a money-making idea!  I want to create a DVD that only holds the amount of data a 3.5" floppy disk would!  You would have enough space to save one Word document!  How retro!

OK, OK...  BUT WHY INSTAGRAM!!!? (Poetic license on the punctuation)

I do feel the need to include a photo that should be Instagram'd (verb, poetic license).  This photo should've used the filter: make this a completely different picture.  But I digress.  Why do we do this?  When did we become a culture of hipster-fads that fools us into feeling we have a unique way of "expressing our feelings creatively"?  (Pretty bold from a guy posting on Blogger, wait no - I don't use Blog-A-Gram)...

I've got news for you - you're creative posers!  The person who created Instagram was creative.  The fact that he created software that makes it easy for you to feel creative doesn't make you creative - it makes you a poser.  But I digress.  Let's first erase this picture from of our memories, and from there lets get back to posting pictures in wonderful 12 megapixels (does that technology exist?  If not, poetic license!)  Should punctuation go inside or outside of parenthesis?  Just in case, here is another (poetic license)

Final Analysis

Let's go back to the time when graphic artists were paid to make a photo look old, or black and white, or look like a completely different photo.  Let's stop adding filters to every f*cking picture that is uploaded to Facebook, and let's tell Instagram that we are no-longer fan-boys.  Creativity is a wonderful thing, let's stop riding the coattails of other's creativeness!