Do we really need... Campaign ads?

Well, another campaign season is upon us, and it is time for Americans to decide what candidate is right for them.  It is also the time of year when we stop posting pictures of dinners we've cooked, cute cats, and status updates like: "Uhh, I woke up tired" on Facebook...  They are all politic-related now.  God how I wish the days back when I could care less if you didn't feel like going to work today!

I can't watch one damn game of football without hearing how Romney wants to kill old people and tax the middle class to death, or hearing that Obama is a socialist Muslim who wasn't born in the United States...  Hey campaign-ad creators: Shut the hell up!  When I see Hakeem Nicks catch a pass in the end-zone for a touchdown, I don't want you ruining my day by buying ad-space (which Coors Light should rightfully have, they make the best commercials) and informing me about the other guy!  Talk about your guy!

My policy is, don't vote for that guy!

*Screen fades in*

"Mitt Romney has herpes.  He once killed a woman with cancer.  Yes, Mitt Romney gives people cancer.  He strapped a dog to the roof of his car.  He once told a gay man he was gay.  Do you want a herpes riddled, cancer-giving, dog-strapping, gay-informing  Mormon running your country?  Vote Obama"

Oh my God (OMG is you were born later than 1992), I will never vote for that guy! Obviously that was a fabrication of a campaign ad, but they are equally ridiculous!  Evidence that these ads sway votes will make me lose complete faith in our democracy, so I'll do no research for that evidence.  I have a hunch that they do actually work.

*Law and Order gavel sound*

"Barrack Obama was born in Kenya.  He eats dogs.  He is a communist who will stop at no means to destroy capitalism.  Obama has herpes and told a gay man about it.  Do you want a foreign, dog-eating communist, socialism-loving, herpes-carrying gay-consoling President to become President again?  Vote Romney"

Is it me, or does everyone running for public office have herpes?  They really need to practice safe-sex over in Washington...  Or not...

On your mark... get set...  LIE!

Aye, there's the rub.  You would have an easier time convincing me that the TV series Lost was a factual documentary, than convincing me that anything said in a campaign ad is not a complete fabrication of the truth.

Here is the biggest irk of them all.  The f*cking money being thrown at these things!  Hey, instead of spending millions creating false ad's against your opponent, spend them to fund the printing of a book titled, I don't know (IDK if you were born after 1992), "Do we really need... this book?"  How that wouldn't benefit society is beyond me.  We should at least try and see.

Every couple of years we allow these things to destroy our already-destroyed television entertainment (thank you MTV, for making TV suck)...  Yet we just live on.  Are we cynical to the point where we believe we aren't paying attention?  I don't know about you, but I am torn between a man who straps dogs to cars and a man who eats them...  I wonder: in which scenario did the dog suffer the least?  And what if it was the same dog?  Poor thing.

Final analysis.

Stop spending campaign finances on this shit.  Actually, donate campaign donations back to the people who donated them to you (Three variations of "donate" in the same sentence...  I'm impressed).  I find it hard to believe this waste of dollars is helping the economy...  "Oh, but filmmakers are getting jobs" you say.  Well, if the people making campaign ads were any good, they wouldn't be making campaign ads... would they?