Do we really need... Food police?

Well...  I regret to say the news has been confirmed.  If you now live in New York City, your beverage intake is going to be reduced to 16oz's.  Serves you right.  It's drinking those 32oz sodas that has made you the fat ass you are.  It was your inability to control your "sugary beverage" intake, and you forced Mayor Bloomberg to take action...  besides, he has to look at you...  every last bit of you.

I'll have a diet coke please.

We all know the joke about the fat chick that goes into McDonald's and orders: A super-sized #1, two double cheeseburgers, a sundae, and a super-healthy diet coke.  I guess her logic is the diet coke will vouch for the rest of the food when it gets into her digestive tract and give her a free pass - Oh, the burgers and ice-cream are with me - if you will.

But seriously, I am sure there is about 300 deli's in a four-mile radius where you can get an obscenely huge sandwich with an assortment of fried crap piled on it.  In what universe does a 16oz soda make an adequate companion to an artery-clogging fat-sandwich?  16oz's is barely enough to wash down 1/4 of this bad-boy.  Or is this population control?  Is Mayor Bloomberg hoping people start choking on fat-sandwiches to death?  New York City is pretty crowded, I'm leaving that speculation on the table for now.  Either way, banning beverage size really doesn't make it seem like Bloomberg is fully committed to making New York City (I think I am just going to use NYC from here on out) healthier.  Or, like most other politicians - he started righting legislation, had an ADD moment, and got busy with something else.  Then three weeks later, he sees the half-written piece of law laying on his desk and had forgotten it wasn't finished, and rammed it through.

Let's make NYC healthy!

OK, I'll help you Mr. Bloomberg.  First, make subway tickets $2,000 a piece so people are forced to walk.  This would give the streets a nice amount of background entertainment because subway performers would be forced to perform in the streets.  Since they will have less need for subway operators, their job will be changed to heckling overweight people walking...  hopefully that will inspire them to get on Craigslist and find a used treadmill.  Oh, and all cabs will be turned into tandem bicycles.  Every passenger will have to pitch in and peddle their own weight.

Fast-food restaurants will serve nothing but apples.  If that is too aggressive, then at least give restaurants the authority to police their own guests.  "No you will not get a #1 and a double cheeseburger", "I'm sorry, you've had all of the bread we think you need", and "I'm sorry, 2 refills is plenty"...  Of course there will be some political correctness back-lash, but Bloomberg: we are talking about people's health here!

Impose a new tax.  This tax will be called "The NYC Marathon Tax" which, by law, you have to participate in the NYC Marathon if you are a resident.

Now, if you really cared about people's health and well-being, this framework sounds like a much better start.  If someone reading this either knows Mr. Bloomberg personally, or at least knows his E-Mail address, do the residents of NYC a favor and send him a link to this website immediately.  NYC is in crisis mode, and I'm here to help.

Final Analysis.

Let's stop pushing ridiculous legislation down peoples' throats under the guise of knowing what is best for us.  And if you really do believe your laws are geared to help people get/stay healthy, at least make sure they make sense for God's sake!  At the end of the day, I think we can deal without food police!